I think your artworks on this chapter are amazing. I'm loving our story evolution and the direction the characters are taking. Noir fiction is about grit, moral ambiguity, and darkness through sex, crime, and violence. Sin Street has all of that.
OK! This is THE BOMB!!! Erin is my girl--straight up! This is how it's done--giving it back 10,000% then, as an appetizer--pissing on the guy's face! Then, having a no-holds-barred fuck on his desk with her boyfriend/Igor! (I'm calling Max "Igor" because Erin's the brains and body and the power in this whole operation--he's along for the ride, and needed for the occasional "ride" in the stress-relief sense. Now for my take on Episode 6. I've been out of position for a bit, now I'm back high-octane, so here it goes. The best thus far--I love the grindhouse sex and violence here--this is real uncensored Tarantino territory right here. Kate--some of your GREATEST WRITING! Some standouts for me:
1) "I indulged in a frequent pleasant dream, where I marinated lasciviously while lying naked in a bath of my enemy's blood, drinking a glass filled with dark emotions that crept through my veins like black fiery tendrils of hatred."
OH YEAH! Visceral, sexualized, vampiric, down-at-the-roots, sadism here--probably how Countess Elizabeth Bathory felt on a regular day!
2) "He caught my evil smile while sinking into his dark oblivion and I watched delightedly when unadulterated terror and his realization of my victory danced raw in my former pimp's drowning eyes."
This right after tricking the bastard into stripping, getting him with the needle--serves the bastard right! Brava for keeping the moment cliche free--you know, like "Take that, you bastard!" kind of stuff--that'd be hokey Disney "Star Wars" crap there--you're way better than that, and this is way better than the losers at any mainstream studio could come up with--they lack the balls to!
Then there are some gems from the banter between Erin and Max:
"Danger is the only thing that might keep me grounded."
My reply: Why be grounded--be a human firestorm and burn them all to a cinder--rebuild the whole fucking world out of your own indestructible alloy according to your own will, no matter the cost!
"Fuck me hard like you're injecting some decency back inside me."
My reply: Decency is overrated at the very least. Also not a lot of fun in the noir world--I say be as libertine and over-the-top as you can!
"I won't outsource my vengeance..."--just thought this was a nice motto.
And as for the dismemberment scene--all of that speaks for itself! Classic, if not standard-setting, grindhouse cinema stuff if this were a flick, and this whole Sin Street thing has Tarantino all over it--of course without primitive, puritanical, prudery such as film ratings, political correctness and such.
Now, Sissitrix. Artistic vision is spot on as always. Love the visual of Erin doing the washdown of Chester--poetic justice. It was a symbolic gesture next to her ordeal, but he got his eventually! Liked her gear too--the garter belt, stockings, heels--the whole slick, sexy powerful woman thing--which she most definitely is--always linked into the erotic writing whenever you've got something like this--any office sex scenario (I think) where you've got a powerful woman (what I like to write about, since I think the standard has been too much in the other direction, or not balancing the scales enough)--the fashion is very important--the convergence of her femininity, sexuality, and power--combining into what I consider an unstoppable force that amps up the fantasy a thousandfold--why I love elegance so much in narrative fiction, even in film (I love classic noir for this reason--the women had seduction down pat--Ava Gardner in her star-making role in "The Killers" is the exemplar--Burt Lancaster literally follows her around with his mouth hanging open like a puppy dog, silently, mesmerized by Gardner in that iconic black dress--they just DON'T have that anymore). But your artwork fits the narrative 100%--both your narrative Kate, and your artwork, Sissitrix, are perfect complements.
Sin Street is a terrific venture--I can't say it enough. You've got the ultimate, 21st century, kickass neo-noir heroine here, operating in an atypical, amoral universe which merges the rawest depictions of savage violence, erotica (encompassing rough, sensual, and ambiguous), and grotesque horror, in the true spirit of each genre.
Hi John, I read all of your critique and reviews at least four times. I'm in awe and sincerely thank you for the assessments. I feel Sissitrix and I have hit on a great indie concept with more people joining all of the time. Being a Universe, some plot is obfuscated a little by forcing readers to take in the character profiles and Bliss Paradox's news bulletins. At this stage we are foreshadowing a great deal of future plot arcs so when the story shifts, new characters come to the fore or others fall away it feels like a natural process rather than a rush to get another chapter out of the door. Sissitrix had created a collaborative chat function where we exchange ideas, shape the plot and sharpen the focus on characters. We agree it is important to build consistency while also adhering to core values in noir fiction. You are hitting on deliberate friction we are building between characters like Erin and Max, where moral ambiguity, selfishness, divergent agenda et all may be, could be, important to the plot later on. Thank you so much for your support.
I get that the "side" stuff (a term I use strictly for convenience) has significance--like "Chekhov's gun," which if it's on stage in Act 1, better be used somehow by the end of the piece! Not there for decoration--takes work and thought, so it's there for a reason. I don't mean to be dismissive of it, and recognize that I'm probably missing out on key clues and plot point allusions, which admittedly throw my little "prophecies" off in a big way--have to catch up to get the whole picture!
First and foremost, let me say again how much your comment gives me another perspective on what we do. It is like adding a new light to the scene. Still the same action but with an enrich experience. And for episode 8, which we publish today, you may recognize some of the influences you dropped here.
I love your vision of the classic noir novel and Ava Gardner as the ultimate archetypal woman. When I draw, all this is mixed with the perfume of the '90s and the photography of Helmut Newton or Guy Bourdin. What's interesting about the artwork is how literally I should translate Kate's writing.
I love this sixth episode. Too many scenes that my passionate mind wants to draw, but my reasoned hands try to reason away.
I think your artworks on this chapter are amazing. I'm loving our story evolution and the direction the characters are taking. Noir fiction is about grit, moral ambiguity, and darkness through sex, crime, and violence. Sin Street has all of that.
OK! This is THE BOMB!!! Erin is my girl--straight up! This is how it's done--giving it back 10,000% then, as an appetizer--pissing on the guy's face! Then, having a no-holds-barred fuck on his desk with her boyfriend/Igor! (I'm calling Max "Igor" because Erin's the brains and body and the power in this whole operation--he's along for the ride, and needed for the occasional "ride" in the stress-relief sense. Now for my take on Episode 6. I've been out of position for a bit, now I'm back high-octane, so here it goes. The best thus far--I love the grindhouse sex and violence here--this is real uncensored Tarantino territory right here. Kate--some of your GREATEST WRITING! Some standouts for me:
1) "I indulged in a frequent pleasant dream, where I marinated lasciviously while lying naked in a bath of my enemy's blood, drinking a glass filled with dark emotions that crept through my veins like black fiery tendrils of hatred."
OH YEAH! Visceral, sexualized, vampiric, down-at-the-roots, sadism here--probably how Countess Elizabeth Bathory felt on a regular day!
2) "He caught my evil smile while sinking into his dark oblivion and I watched delightedly when unadulterated terror and his realization of my victory danced raw in my former pimp's drowning eyes."
This right after tricking the bastard into stripping, getting him with the needle--serves the bastard right! Brava for keeping the moment cliche free--you know, like "Take that, you bastard!" kind of stuff--that'd be hokey Disney "Star Wars" crap there--you're way better than that, and this is way better than the losers at any mainstream studio could come up with--they lack the balls to!
Then there are some gems from the banter between Erin and Max:
"Danger is the only thing that might keep me grounded."
My reply: Why be grounded--be a human firestorm and burn them all to a cinder--rebuild the whole fucking world out of your own indestructible alloy according to your own will, no matter the cost!
"Fuck me hard like you're injecting some decency back inside me."
My reply: Decency is overrated at the very least. Also not a lot of fun in the noir world--I say be as libertine and over-the-top as you can!
"I won't outsource my vengeance..."--just thought this was a nice motto.
And as for the dismemberment scene--all of that speaks for itself! Classic, if not standard-setting, grindhouse cinema stuff if this were a flick, and this whole Sin Street thing has Tarantino all over it--of course without primitive, puritanical, prudery such as film ratings, political correctness and such.
Now, Sissitrix. Artistic vision is spot on as always. Love the visual of Erin doing the washdown of Chester--poetic justice. It was a symbolic gesture next to her ordeal, but he got his eventually! Liked her gear too--the garter belt, stockings, heels--the whole slick, sexy powerful woman thing--which she most definitely is--always linked into the erotic writing whenever you've got something like this--any office sex scenario (I think) where you've got a powerful woman (what I like to write about, since I think the standard has been too much in the other direction, or not balancing the scales enough)--the fashion is very important--the convergence of her femininity, sexuality, and power--combining into what I consider an unstoppable force that amps up the fantasy a thousandfold--why I love elegance so much in narrative fiction, even in film (I love classic noir for this reason--the women had seduction down pat--Ava Gardner in her star-making role in "The Killers" is the exemplar--Burt Lancaster literally follows her around with his mouth hanging open like a puppy dog, silently, mesmerized by Gardner in that iconic black dress--they just DON'T have that anymore). But your artwork fits the narrative 100%--both your narrative Kate, and your artwork, Sissitrix, are perfect complements.
Sin Street is a terrific venture--I can't say it enough. You've got the ultimate, 21st century, kickass neo-noir heroine here, operating in an atypical, amoral universe which merges the rawest depictions of savage violence, erotica (encompassing rough, sensual, and ambiguous), and grotesque horror, in the true spirit of each genre.
Now I'm on to Part 7!
Hi John, I read all of your critique and reviews at least four times. I'm in awe and sincerely thank you for the assessments. I feel Sissitrix and I have hit on a great indie concept with more people joining all of the time. Being a Universe, some plot is obfuscated a little by forcing readers to take in the character profiles and Bliss Paradox's news bulletins. At this stage we are foreshadowing a great deal of future plot arcs so when the story shifts, new characters come to the fore or others fall away it feels like a natural process rather than a rush to get another chapter out of the door. Sissitrix had created a collaborative chat function where we exchange ideas, shape the plot and sharpen the focus on characters. We agree it is important to build consistency while also adhering to core values in noir fiction. You are hitting on deliberate friction we are building between characters like Erin and Max, where moral ambiguity, selfishness, divergent agenda et all may be, could be, important to the plot later on. Thank you so much for your support.
I get that the "side" stuff (a term I use strictly for convenience) has significance--like "Chekhov's gun," which if it's on stage in Act 1, better be used somehow by the end of the piece! Not there for decoration--takes work and thought, so it's there for a reason. I don't mean to be dismissive of it, and recognize that I'm probably missing out on key clues and plot point allusions, which admittedly throw my little "prophecies" off in a big way--have to catch up to get the whole picture!
Actually.... you’re very accurate.
Cool--very cool.
First and foremost, let me say again how much your comment gives me another perspective on what we do. It is like adding a new light to the scene. Still the same action but with an enrich experience. And for episode 8, which we publish today, you may recognize some of the influences you dropped here.
I love your vision of the classic noir novel and Ava Gardner as the ultimate archetypal woman. When I draw, all this is mixed with the perfume of the '90s and the photography of Helmut Newton or Guy Bourdin. What's interesting about the artwork is how literally I should translate Kate's writing.
Let's jump to Part 7…